Remember
by Maya Beebop
Summary: Spike remembers what happens after the Bebop...


"You remember, don't you, Spike?!"

She aimed the gun at me.

"Yeah, I remember," I muttered. I remembered how I left her there, two years ago. Left her on the corner. In the rain.

She had stood with her back to me. I had reached out to her to comfort her. She tried to brush my hand away by pulling her shoulder from beneath, but I could already see her tears. I saw them sparkle, unshed, in her eyes. I saw one streak down her cheek.

"You…remember, don't you Spike?" she had asked, even back then.

Back to the present. Memories were pesky things, after all. No point in them. It was time to deal with the here and now. Sure I remembered. Even though I didn't want to, I did.

"Why didn't you come? Why did you leave me there, Spike?! _WHY?!_"

"Because…because I couldn't. I'm sorry. But I couldn't." I turned to go.

A bullet grazed my ear. Shell-shocked, I spun around. She hadn't fired at me. It was the man behind her. His arm, holding the gun, extended towards me. His face scarred. I knew that face.

Somewhere in the city, a dog barked. Howled. It chilled me to the bone while comforting me. I remembered a time when I listened for a dog.

"Remember, Spike? Remember…" The man's voice was almost accusing.

I remembered him, too. I remembered his ship. It was always in the hangar. I had worked next to it long enough to know him. And I did.

_I walked down the hallway. I could smell burning meat, so I looked in the galley. Jet was, again, experimenting with lamb. It never turned out well for him, and the poor beast was always singed till the bone was black. Never a pretty picture. I wondered if he knew Ed was in there, drowning his bonsai trees._

Faye was her usual moody self. Hadn't said a word since she lost her last share of a bounty in the Roulette Casino. Which was fine by me, since I can't stand women with attitudes, especially when I didn't deserve them.

I sat on the yellow couch, and Ein leapt up and planted himself on my lap. Strangely, I didn't push him off. I let him sit, and eventually fall asleep.

A buzzer pounded loudly into my head. The proximity warnings. I leapt up and felt the entire ship rock. We'd been hit.

As Ein squealed with indignity and pain, I jumped over him and raced for the artillery. Sitting in my chair I scanned the area. Jet was at my side. We located the offender as they sped away.

"I'm going after them!" I yelled to Jet over the din of noise being created by the buzzers.

"But you-…" He never had a chance to finish, because I was already out and gone. I strapped myself into the Swordfish, which I barely did these days. The hangar opened, and I was off into the vacuum.

Trailing their energy wake, I caught up to them on an abandoned meteor as big as Ganymede. I landed and saw a figure leap out of their ancient ship. Long, blonde hair betrayed the female's identity.

Julia.

I knew it couldn't be her. She had died long ago. In actuality it was only a few weeks back, but it felt like eternity.

It was like following her footsteps, tracing her trail, trying to guess where she'd land next. I had died the day she was shot, and seeing her here, alive, made me feel as if I was an empty body.

"The doctors, they found me and froze me. Operated and brought me back, Spike. But now…" she began to explain when we had sat down. I still held my gun, trembling. I was afraid, as any man would be when seeing his thought to be dead old flame.

"What now?" I asked.

"They say I only have about a week left. They could only give me a month. A month, Spike! Then…I die again." she proclaimed in anguish.

"I come back to life with a chance to get things straight with you, and then I die. Please, Spike, try to understand. I…I want to say I'm sorry. For leading you on. For letting you suffer. Oh please, Spike, don't blame Vicious or the Syndicate. It's not their fault. Besides, they're not in our lives anymore. I mean your_ life. Mine's almost gone. Maybe three days at most."_

I had sat, motionless. Now an idea, however as crazy as it might have seemed, began to worm its way into my mind. I grabbed her hand and pulled her up.

"C'mon. We can go! Let's leave this place and get you life. If you only have three days, fine. But let's not waste them sulking and dwelling on what-ifs. Let's go!"

"It won't work. I can't go back. I…have nothing. Nothing to live for, nothing to keep. Forget it."

"Spike, you owe us. You owe _her_. She's missed you, Spike. And that _dog_. It hasn't shut up since you left." I couldn't look him in the eye. He walked away, disgusted.

_Julia had died three days later, in my arms. Again. I couldn't bear to go back. Not after abandoning that life. A man has his pride, and when that pride is wounded, it's worth nothing more than holding onto the torn remains for dear life, like a security blanket._

I walked up to the woman. A big tear slid down her cheek. I held her shoulders reassuringly.

"You know I can't do it. Tell her…no. Don't tell her. It'd break her heart."

She looked up at me. "B-But what about…?"

"No. I just can't. She thinks I'm dead. And I am."

She looked down. "Then…"

I looked at her fallen head. She glanced up. Our eyes locked for a second, and it happened so fast. Suddenly, we were in a deep kiss, and she didn't want to let go. So I tore away and started walking.

Sure I remembered. But memories were pesky things after all.


End file.
